Why Pickup Artistry Won’t Work with Online Dating

“She’ll misunderstand your pick-up lines”

PUAs, also known as Pick Up Artists, offer some very tempting insights into the dating and hookup scene that you may be tempted to follow even when you are meeting women online. Pickup artistry may have given you some confidence with meeting women in the past, and you may even have enjoyed moderate success using their techniques. However, meeting women in bars and clubs is a lot different from meeting women online, so there are some key things you should keep in mind when trying to introduce pickup artistry into your online dating techniques – and why it won’t work.

Tone of Voice Is Extremely Important

Negging, or the act of mildly insulting a woman in order to get her attention, is one of the main aspects of pickup artistry – and it’s also one of the tactics that will enjoy very limited success when translated into an online forum. Negging is difficult to make work even in a face to face setting, but it becomes nearly impossible when you translate it into a text based format. The important part of negging a woman is being able to insult her in a mild, joking manner and then change your tone in a positive way to make it seem like you were just teasing her. In other words, it almost entirely relies on your tone of voice and how you can bounce back from the insult. Online, this is almost impossible to do because all she has to rely on is your words alone. Sarcasm is very difficult to portray online, so negging is even more difficult to properly achieve. She’s much more likely to just think you’re being a douche and insulting her, and all the possible positive effects of negging will be diminished.

Body Language Plays a Key Role

“It can be quite hard to pick up women online”

Body language and general nonverbal communication is a seriously important aspect of any pickup attempt, and almost all of it is left up to a woman’s imagination when you message her on an Internet dating site. Pickup artistry depends on the manipulation of your own body language and the interpretation of hers, so it becomes very difficult to even attempt most pickup artistry tactics when engaging a woman on the Internet. Most of the general tactics are just going to come off as being overly rude and annoying online since you don’t have the body language and tone of voice to back it up.

Sometimes It’s Too Obvious

Internet interactions lack most of the subtlety that personal interactions do, so sometimes the tactics that you employ may come off as being very obvious online. Interacting in person with a woman doesn’t allow her much time to process what you’ve said to her before she needs to respond. However, a woman who receives a message online can take as much time as she wants to look it over and come up with her response. This means that she has more time to think about what you’ve written to her, which negates even more of the pickup artistry tactics. It’s best just to stick to what you know about interacting with women when choosing to message them online.

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